Sunday, July 12, 2009

Like mother, like son

The Star,June 12, 2009 Edition 1,Kathleen Bartels

I know the mother of a boy from Parktown Boys' High School. One evening I came across conversation that several Parktown Boys' mothers were having on Facebook, posting vicious threats about Pene Kimber for all the world to see.

One of these comments about Kimber, who became notorious after protesting against alleged violent initiation practices at the school, was "The wheels turn … slowly". What exactly does this mean? Does it suggest that Kimber will get her come-uppance for daring to speak out in the interests of her child?

This is not a scene out of a fictional Lord of the Flies. It is real life. I admire Kimber for taking on the bureaucratic beast of Parktown Boys. But let's not lay the blame entirely at the school's door. Values are learnt - and taught - at home. If these mothers are prepared to air their threats and blindly loyal views to an institute, and about a tradition about which they know precious little, in a profoundly public space like Facebook, then I shudder to imagine the conversation around the dinner table. What are these mothers teaching their sons?

As a mother of two precious young sons, I will do everything in my power, like Kimber, to prevent abuse or treatment of my sons that can lead to a lifetime of emotional or physical scars. It is our job as adults - and as parents - to make sure it doesn't happen on our watch. Not, ladies, to stand and cheer the bullies on from the sidelines.

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